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5 Useful Setups To Use EFT Tapping For Anger And Other Frustrations

Letters EFT representing emotional freedom technique.

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Many people now use EFT Tapping for anger and other frustrations. So how cool is it to have a tool to turn down the thermostat when you get heated and annoyed? EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. Gary Craig created this unique way of calming yourself down in the early 1990s. Maybe it can help you too.

Gary was an Engineer from Stanford University. He was also a Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and other forms of Energy Psychology. It was important to him that anyone could learn and use EFT Tapping.

The EFT Tapping technique consists of tapping meridian points on the face, hands, head, and torso while telling the story of what is bothering you. You can learn the technique here The Tapping Solution.

woman with anger facial expression illustrating how someone might feel who is needing to use EFT tapping for Anger.

Everybody Gets Angry Sometimes.

Have you ever just felt like you were being eaten alive by anger? Sometimes it’s not that you are about to take someone out with your temper. It’s more of a slow smoldering burn that gnaws at your stomach and your soul and makes your head hurt.  How To Improve My Energy Field? 5 Fabulous Ways To Really Feel Better

Using EFT Tapping for anger is a quick way to cool yourself off effectively and easily. Anger and frustration are two of the many things you can use EFT tapping for. This isn’t about pushing anger down or avoiding your feelings. EFT is about calming yourself down to get to what is really bothering you. (Hint: sometimes what bothers you is something different than you thought).

Chalkboard with numbering ten to one illustrating ranking system used when doing EFT Tapping for Anger

You begin by thinking of what you are feeling and what is upsetting you. Then give it a number from 1 to 10. Consider 1 being no big deal and a 10 feeling that your head is about to come off your shoulders and run down the street by itself.

The purpose of the number is so you know if you are heading in a helpful direction or getting further away. The goal is to get that number to below a 5 and preferably a 1 or 2. Situations of 5 or above get the most change and effect.

Boy looking through magnifying glass illustrating questions about using EFT Tapping for Anger

How Do You Feel?

You then create a setup statement that best expresses how you feel. This statement will read as, “Even though I _____, I deeply love and accept myself.” You will say this while tapping on the fat pad at the side of your hand beneath your pinky finger.

Then you begin tapping the meridian point sequence at your inner eyebrow. You will either use the main words of your setup statement or simply tell the story.

But the setup statement often gets people hung up in the process. They know the tapping points, and they know the sequence. However, they don’t know how to start the whole thing.

The setup is the meat and potatoes of expressing what is wrong. But words for anger can be tough to come up with when in most cultures, giving words to anger is not encouraged.  How To Improve My Energy Field? 5 Fabulous Ways To Really Feel Better

Woman with a stressful facial expression representing someone who may need EFT Tapping for Anger.

Don’t be upset with yourself if you have to take a minute to express your feelings honestly.

Who or what are you mad at, and why are you so angry? Even if the words seem irrational or harsh, they are the most helpful way to create your set-up. No one else can hear you. No one’s feelings are going to get hurt. You are just sorting. Be as genuine and truthful as you can be.

So let’s create suggestions for when you get stuck in the setup or don’t know how to get started.

Words yes I can be angry illustrating the importance to give yourself permission to be angry when using EFT Tapping for Anger.

Useful Set Up To Use EFT Tapping For Anger #1-Give Yourself Permission To Be Angry.

Most of us try to avoid public outbursts of anger. We also try hard not to lose our cookies with those we care about. But many take that a step further. We don’t allow ourselves to be angry or to express anger.

Do you allow yourself to feel anger? We aren’t talking about taking that anger or frustration out on other people. We mean, do you allow yourself to FEEL anger, express anger, and sort through your angry thoughts?

Many of us were raised in homes where no one’s anger mattered except an angry parent’s. Some of us were raised in homes where our parents didn’t express anger, and it wasn’t encouraged for anyone else in the house to, either.

Man with a fake smile.

“Be nice,” “Don’t make a fuss,” or just a condemning, “Suck it up, buttercup.” How many of us have heard that from well-meaning grown-ups? So instead, we are suggesting permitting yourself to feel what you feel. How To Improve My Energy Field? 5 Fabulous Ways To Really Feel Better

When it’s time to sort, calm and heal your feelings, thoughts, and experience, EFT Tapping is a great place to start. With that in mind, you might need to start with an accurate and solid setup.

EFT Tapping Setup Suggestion:

1.) “Even though I’m furious, I deeply love and accept myself.”

2.) “Even though I’m mad at myself for being mad, I deeply love and accept myself.”

3.) “Even though I don’t want to be angry and frustrated, I deeply love and accept myself.”

Woman with her hands on her heart illustrating the second useful set up for EFT Tapping for anger.

Useful Set Up To Use EFT Tapping For Anger #2- Say Exactly What You Mean.

“Where do I get this thing started?” is a common question. The best thing to do is close your eyes, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, “What am I feeling? Then ask yourself, “Now…what am I really feeling?”

It might take a few tries to fit the most accurate words to the emotion. Maybe you start with, “Even though I’m annoyed about XXXX!” After checking in, you know that’s not going to get it. Then you might up the intensity to, “Even though I’m furious about XXXXX,”

But what if those words still don’t feel like enough? What if your feelings are even more extensive than that? Then clarity comes to you, “Even though I’m enraged about XXXX,” Yes, that’s precisely it. Don’t be embarrassed. Don’t worry about being over dramatic if that is how you feel, “rage” is your word. How To Improve My Energy Field? 5 Fabulous Ways To Really Feel Better

EFT for Tapping can only work if you are transparent with yourself. This is a quiet time with you. Say what you mean. Don’t overdo it but don’t water down your emotions.

EFT Tapping Setup Suggestions:

1.) “Even though I’m enraged at how I was treated at dinner tonight, I deeply love and accept myself.”

2.) “Even though I’ve never been this mad in my life, I deeply love and accept myself.”

Sticky notes with names illustrating the forth useful setup to use EFT tapping for anger.

Useful Set Up To Use EFT Tapping For Anger #3 Name Names.

Often we don’t want to acknowledge we are angry or frustrated at the people we love. It can also feel wrong to be upset with people when we don’t want them to have hurt feelings or be upset with us.

For that reason, we often need to remember to name names. For example, who are you mad at, and why? It’s powerful to state clearly that you are angry and to whom that powerful emotion is pointing.

Name names. Say it out loud. Who is it that inspired this feeling? Don’t assume it’s all their fault, but where did this start? Who are you believing slighted you, meant you harm, or was careless with you? Name it and say it out loud.

EFT Tapping Setup Suggestions:

1.) “Even though I am angry about my phone call with Mom this morning, I deeply love and accept myself.”

2.) “Even though that post on Facebook made me angry, I deeply love and accept myself.”

3.) “Even though I’m so angry with Jill right now, I deeply love and accept myself.”

Cat with written message asking if anger can really be something else.

Useful Set Up To Use EFT Tapping For Anger #4-Don’t Be Surprised If What Feels Like Anger Is Really Something Else.

In high school Psychology 101 class, you learn that anger is a cover-up emotion. It can’t exist on its own. It always covers up another feeling, which often has something to do with fear. What might feel like anger could be jealousy. Jealousy is usually about fear of losing something or that someone will get something you want.

Anger can cover up fear of abandonment, fear of loss, and fear of being disrespected. Of course, we all can get steamed when someone insults us. But even that is fear that the insult is true or that others will agree.

Chalkboard with one arrow being erased and the other arrow going in a different direction illustrating the need to reset tapping set up.

When doing EFT Tapping, it’s not unusual to start on one thing to realize it’s really something else. Maybe you aren’t angry about the phone call with Mom but upset that what she said was true. Perhaps you aren’t angry about the Facebook post but afraid that the world is going to hell in a hoola hoop.

If you find that anger isn’t what you are feeling, tap on what the real emotion is.

EFT Tapping Setup Suggestions:

1.) “Even though I feel embarrassed that Mom was right this morning, I deeply love and accept myself.”

2.) “Even though I let that post on Facebook make me feel scared and vulnerable, I deeply love and accept myself.”

Woman hugging herself illustrating self-compassion and kindness.

Useful Set Up To Use EFT Tapping For Anger #5- Be Gracious With Yourself If You Find Out You Are Really Angry With You.

Sometimes midway through the EFT Tapping process, we realize that we aren’t mad at anyone we think we are mad at. Instead, we are angry and frustrated with ourselves for doing something, not doing something, or not doing something well enough.

What started as “Even though I’m angry about my phone call with Mom” can turn into “Even though I’m embarrassed that Mom was right this morning.” Then that can turn into, “Even though I’m angry with myself for not visiting my parents more often.”

Check-in and ensure you aren’t doing any self-flogging or making something yours that isn’t. After that, double-check. Is the feeling anger, and who am I really angry at in this moment? If so, the next step is…grace.

Woman in field of flowers illustrating self-compassion and self-care.

Give yourself grace. That’s not the same as not making changes and upgrades to yourself and your life. That means offering yourself the same tolerance, patience, and care as you would anyone else you love. Then redo your EFT Tapping Setup.

EFT Tapping Setup Suggestions:

1.) “Even though I’ve neglected to give my family any energy or attention, I deeply love and accept myself.”

2.) “Even though I let social media sucker me in again, I deeply love and accept myself.”

Sticky note with handwritten message it's ok to re-set up your set up.

It’s OK To Need To RE-SET UP Your Setup.

Getting the proper Setup for your EFT Tapping for anger makes all the difference. What’s the appropriate setup? Only you can know that. The way you know is how you feel. Imagine having coffee with a close friend, and they say something that is so on the nose you can’t imagine they aren’t reading your mind.

Imagine a song that describes your feelings like someone is taking dictation from your brain. That is the feeling we are going for when creating your EFT Tapping Setup. It’s a straightforward sentence. Try on different words till your next thought is, “THAT’S IT!!”

If a feeling shifts or changes, create another setup that is now accurate to how you feel. Use EFT Tapping for anger and other frustrations as many times a day as you need it. You will notice that you aren’t stuffing feeling down but freeing your emotions to a place of ease. That is what EFT Tapping does for us. Learn it. Use It. Enjoy the results. You’ve got this!

Looking for more energy suggestions, click here: How To Improve My Energy Field? 5 Fabulous Ways To Really Feel Better

Pixi-Pebbles For EFT Tapping for Anger.

Pixi-Pebbles are songs, quotes, videos, interviews, movie references, and books that we each personally pick for you.

We’ve used these little Pixi-Pebbles to move ourselves from a feeling we’re not enjoying very much…to a feeling that helps us discover our vision of intention, awareness, and direction.

They lead us to hope, possibilities, and a fire under our butt to live life by design instead of default.

In our blog 5 Useful Setups To Use EFT Tapping For Anger, these are the Pixi-Pebbles that came to mind. 

Just a little inspiration to get you from here to there.

EFT Tapping for Anger is a fantastic Pixi-Pebble when you are feeling frustrated, irritated and…angry. There are so many other Pixi-Pebbles to help with anger in addition to EFT. One of our favorites is Louise Hay‘s meditation for releasing anger. Click here to listen!

Meet Nikki:

Nikki has a way of making almost anything meaningful, interesting, and fun. She loves cats, believes you can learn a lot about yourself by shooting hoops in the park, and has a mad love affair with trees. As a Certified Neuro-linguistic Programming Practitioner, Intentional Living Mentor, Reiki Master, and Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, she understands how to help others create change and has a talent for making you enjoy doing it.

Enchanted perspectives creator Nikki and Jennifer sitting against tree

Meet Jennifer:

Jennifer is a woman who definitely lives life by design. As an Artist, Certified Holistic Life Coach, Reiki Master Teacher, Spiritual Studies Mentor, and Certified EFT Practitioner, she helps others find their unique, magical, and authentic selves. She loves art, music, nature, travel and believes everyone can dance. Jennifer is a compassionate teacher that enjoys inspiring others to find their own creativity, intuition, and passion for life.
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